Taking action is better than wallowing in despair
Thursday is ‘A’ level results day in the UK. Thousands of students will have to make decisions about their future; none of them (despite what people tell them) will know what they will be doing five years from now. And yet, they are expected to make life-changing decisions with minimal information, except that provided by people trying to sell them something.
No wonder so many young people are disillusioned (except for those featured on the front page of The Daily Telegraph: every year they show pretty young girls waving bits of paper to their friends).
But, young people, do not despair because that leads to more problems. Instead, think about what actions you can take to improve your lot in life.
The worst thing you can do is … nothing. The fear of the problem is often worse than the problem itself.
The second worst thing you can do is keep it to yourself. Even talking to your cat is better than bottling things up. However, it is unlikely that your cat can help you practically, so talking to a human is better.
Apart from your family, the general population will be unreceptive to general moroseness, so avoid moaning. Instead, telling people about your ideas, a sort of verbal wool-gathering, may lead to ideas being bounced back. Not solutions (no one likes a know-it-all, especially when they tell you about outdated concepts from 30 years ago) but ideas.
You simply can’t know everything at a young age (nor at 55), so sharing with people with different backgrounds may generate information that is relevant and potentially useful. Even if it leads to a dead end, it helps you understand what is working and what is not.
By the end of the day or the week, you will have relevant information at your fingertips. You will feel better about having done something.
Step 2: Keep going.
Again, unless you are one of the privileged few who are going to be parachuted into a career at a business owned by your parents (or their friends), then progress will take time.
You may not be where you want to be today, or even tomorrow, but you can make steps towards the future you want. This is why work is important, as well as education. You might not think working in the local pub or shop fits in with your ‘career pathway,’ but all work teaches you something.
Dealing with human beings outside of your peer group is one. Learning to be on time, work under pressure, handle money, start conversations, make eye-contact, and to be cheerful even when you don’t feel like it: all of these might come in handy when you go for an interview and have to work with other people.
Admittedly, getting an interview is hard due to the AI and HR filters, but you aren’t in control of that. You are in control of making the most of your situation and learning from it.
Plus, the self-worth and self-esteem derived from earning a wage and then having, hopefully, disposable income that is yours is immeasurable. I am aware that for many young people, working is not a lifestyle choice but a necessity (it was for me too, that’s one reason I didn’t go to university) and that others living in rural or coastal areas may have less opportunity.
Forgetting about money for a minute, building any habit – exercise, volunteering, reading, learning a language or how to play an instrument – also builds self-respect.
3: Life is tough, so work on what you can.
‘Control the controllables,’ is an old sports-psychology adage. It means focus on what you can control, rather than worrying about what you can’t. It’s easier said than done, but if you are able, it works because your mind needs something to think about and it’s better than doomscrolling other people’s lifestyles on Instagram!
Three qualities that are useful in coaching and cause people to trust you and come back for more are here:
Again, it’s not all encompassing, but it’s a start (see working in hospitality/ retail on how to develop these skills).
I do not envy young people as they navigate through the world for the first time, but I hope to support my children and the young athletes I coach as best as I can. The world has changed since my youth, but I have faith in humanity.
Excelsior!